Our 63^rd Wedding Anniversary

Mary Jane died on April 19, 2021, less than a month after her 85^th birthday and less than 2 months before our 62^nd wedding anniversary. Today, June 13, 2022, we would be celebrating 63 years of marriage.

Even though it has been more than a year since her passing, I have done almost nothing in the way of cleaning out her things from my house, not for any particular reason, but simply because I have not felt the need to do so. I don’t need the space. I have plenty of room in my house for the possessions I have and simply have not felt the need, emotionally or otherwise, to do so. As a result, my house is essentially in the same condition it was on the day she passed away.

So, as I move around my house from day to day, cleaning or doing other chores around the house, I come across things that remind me of special days in our lives together. The following are some of those special items along with a brief description of why they bring special thoughts.

The first gift I gave her was for our wedding day. And there is a bit of a special story about this.

My parents gave me a book on men’s etiquette published by Esquire Magazine for one of my birthdays when I was in college. I referred to it often over the years, but especially with regard to our wedding. I really didn’t know much about what was expected of a groom with respect to the bride, and I wanted to do things right. So, I consulted the etiquette book and learned that it was customary for the groom to give his new bride a gift on their wedding day, and that a string of pearls that the bride could wear for the wedding ceremony was a traditional favorite gift from groom to bride. So, I went shopping at our local jewelry store for a string of pearls for MJ. I knew that I probably could not afford to buy a string of real natural pearls, but I did want to get real pearls and not just artificial or simulated pearls. So, I asked to see some cultured pearls. (You can read about the different kinds of pearls by clicking here.) The jeweler showed me a nice string of cultured pearls which I bought. I gave her the pearls the night before the wedding, and she wore them for the ceremony the next day. See the picture on the right.

I don't remember how much I paid for the pearls back in 1959, but I have to think it was one of the best purchases I've ever made. Not only were they a special nostalgic memory from our wedding, but they were also one of MJ's favorite pieces of jewelry over the almost sixty-two years of our marriage. She wore them many times.

The certificate that came with the pearls is shown on the right.

For our twentieth anniversary, I gave her this plate with twenty (count ’em!) hearts around the edge. She used it on her dresser in the bedroom to keep her earrings and other jewelry items on when she went to bed. It’s still setting on the dresser. See the picture on the left.

For our twenty-fifth anniversary, I gave her this picture, ’Sweetheart Cottage II’, by Thomas Kinkade with poem by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, ’How Do I Love Thee?’ It’s hanging on the wall next to our bed. See the picture on the right.

Click here
to read the sonnet,
'How Do I Love Thee?',
by
Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

For our fortieth anniversary, our kids had a surprise dessert party for us in the Fireside Room at our church (Rose Drive Friends Church in Yorba Linda, CA). They invited about thirty of our special friends as guests. See a picture of the invitation on the left.

For our fiftieth anniversary, our kids had a party for us at Murphy's Restaurant in Prescott, AZ. We had twenty of our friends as guests and had a great time reminiscing and telling stories about our courtship and married life. The invitation is pictured on the right.

After she passed away, I had some of her ashes fused into a solid glass heart for a memorial for her. Her favorite color was blue so I chose a navy and silver color combination for the heart. The speckles you see in the heart are her fused-in ashes.

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